Variable May

Have you ever felt like, when putting all your heart and effort in a friendship to make it last, to be a good friend, being always there whenever that certain person needs it; have you ever felt like this all just ain't enough?

I'm really fed up with fake friendships. It's like, I met her 3 years ago and already in first year of our conversence she hurt me. I forgave and kinda move on, we had better connection and we were hanging out. I accepted her the way she is, but the thing is, she keeps hurting me. It doesn't make sense to retell the story now, but she's not even talking with me, she cannot look me in the eyes because of what she has done. I just can't understand how did I desirve all that shit? Don't get me wrong, I don't think that shit only happens to me, but I find myself a good friend. Ofcourse, I am consciouss that I make mistakes, and I'm consciouss of my drawbacks... but that's just not a good reason to be a bitch towards me when you know me for so long and know my contemplation on things. Like, I would really appriciate and like to hear the truth even if it hurts me. You must agree that this beautiful mask is showing exactly what I am saying here. She's all pretty from the outside and her fake behaviour looks just like you'd wish someone is acting towards you, but from the inside she's just an insecure, lying, and not good enough friend. I kinda feel sorry for her, cause she's not gonna change ever. Thinking about all this situation made me ask myself questions and quiz myself as a person, but you know what? She isn't even worth it, no one is worth it. I'm done with that "friendship".

Now, let's move to some better, happier topics. :)

Last weekend I spent in Koprivnica with my boyfriend and bestfriend. I had an amazing time. We invented our salad, watched Season of the Witch with Nicolas Cage, and met with my boyfriend, spent some time at my friend's home and then in the midnight went to the playground 10 minutes from his home. It was so nice to lay down on the blanket, listen to Airplanes[B.o.B. ft. Hayley Williams & Eminem-it's such a pleasure to hear Hayley's and Eminem's voice!], look at the stars and talk. On Sunday I had to go home unfortunately :(

I can't wait for the June 4th to see my boyfriend :D <3

It seems like this post will be long, sorry. I am so busy over the week that I barely can come online to check my mails. It's such a snort in school that I can't wait it to finally end. As soon as I deal with all the subjects[17!!!] I'll be more often on here.

I'm home today and just enjoying with Elle, black tea I got from London and some snacks =)